This morning, my partner uttered the words, Happy Valentine's Day. And, as a person who lives with the daily intention of being love, my immediate reaction was, "you know that I don't celebrate this day specifically." Over the years, I have practiced to not rain on the parades of those who do cherish this day. Look, as a lover of love, I do celebrate that there is an en-masse focus on this concept of love and I am learning to simply accept the nature of how it is celebrated currently.
Yet, the commercialization of love and overconsuming of it on one day, takes away from beauty of what love can offer if practiced more consistently. Yes, it is a practice to live in love, rather than in fear, judgement or discontent. Imagine if we woke up every day and we chose to do one action based on love. Or simply to remember to guide our spoken and written language as statements of love and healing. And, then of course to train the thoughts, which are so habit driven and learned and most difficult to maneuver. Imagine if our thoughts to self and judgement about others were more understanding and love-based.
A lot of my inspiration and desire to being love has come from Ram Dass' teachings on the subject. In his book Be Love Now: The Path of the Heart he writes,
Imagine feeling more love from someone than you have ever known. You’re being loved even more than your mother loved you when you were an infant, more than you were ever loved by your father, your child, or your most intimate lover—anyone. This lover doesn’t need anything from you, isn’t looking for personal gratification, and only wants your complete fulfillment.
You are loved just for being who you are, just for existing. You don’t have to do anything to earn it. Your shortcomings, your lack of self-esteem, physical perfection, or social and economic success— none of that matters. No one can take this love away from you, and it will always be here.
Imagine that being in this love is like relaxing endlessly into a warm bath that surrounds and supports your every movement, so that every thought and feeling is permeated by it. You feel as though you are dissolving into love.
This love is actually part of you; it is always flowing through you. It’s like the subatomic texture of the universe, the dark matter that connects everything. When you tune in to that flow, you will feel it in your own heart—not your physical heart or your emotional heart, but your spiritual heart, the place you point to in your chest when you say, "I am."
This is your deeper heart, your intuitive heart. It is the place where the higher mind, pure awareness, the subtler emotions, and your soul identity all come together and you connect to the universe, where presence and love are. Unconditional love really exists in each of us. It is part of our deep inner being. It is not so much an active emotion as a state of being. It’s not “I love you” for this or that reason, not “I love you if you love me.” It’s love for no reason, love without an object. It’s just sitting in love, a love that incorporates the chair and the room and permeates everything around. The thinking mind is extinguished in love.
Hence, the invitation is to microdose love. Every single day make one gesture that expresses love towards self. Make love an embodied practice and one that beings to live within the body again. Slowly moving away from love that is transactional, of this giving and taking, but one where it radiates so deeply that your gravitational pull towards all things love become the norm. And this is not to say difficult moments will no longer arise, but even those can then met with pür love.
Now, before I end this I want to say that even my response this morning was not fully love-based. I wish I had replied with a simple I love you. And, that's where the practice continues. Not every thought needs be uttered out loud. That, I am still learning.
Much love. Today and Everyday!